Thank you Time!
1. Do not say “Wow, you must have twins in there!” or “Did you swallow a basketball?” or “I don’t see any evidence!” In fact, do not comment on size, period. (Ever. Gestational status notwithstanding.) Some of us aren’t comfortable with how big we’ve gotten, and others aren’t comfortable with how small we are. “You look lovely!” will do just fine, thanks.
2. Do not, unsolicited, regale a first-time mom with stories of an episiotomy that left you permanently incontinent, or how you know someone whose epidural didn’t work so labor was more like writhing-silently-in-pain, make-your-best-Edvard-Munch-face twilight sleep from 1950s horror-flick lore. (If she wants to pursue anecdotal gore — and many of us do and will — let
me her initiate that indelicate conversation.)
3. Refrain from telling her you think everything pregnancy- or childbirth-related is gross (even though it most certainly is). After your mom gained a…
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